Sassy’s list of banned furniture
As a new homeowner, the quest for proper home furnishings is a relentless pursuit. From antique stores to garage stores to Craigslist, the search continues. Here’s a quick list of furniture that is banned from Casa De Sassy, for your reading enjoyment.
- Black lacquer furniture of any kind (single man alert)
- ‘Entertainment Centers’ (why do people need these?)
- Anything made of melamine, engineered wood, or particle board (lifespan: 3 years?)
- 70′s era rounded oak bookshelves
- Anything “tuscan” style or made of stone (for indoors… what is this, an ancient temple?)
- Used couches or mattresses of any kind (gross)
- Anything ‘vintage’. Vintage is a code word for ‘seventies’.
- Anything made of green, grey, black, or purple leather. There are no teal cows.
- Anything from Ikea. (lifespan: 1 year? See ‘particle board’)
- ‘Shabby Chic’ furniture which is actually just shabby.
- Futons of any kind (see ‘used mattresses’)
- Papasan chairs and beanbags (seventies are over, kids)
- Bamboo, Wicker or Rattan!
- Asian-themed furniture of any kind.
- Beds with integrated shelving or lighting.